Beware of the Rant

I am beginning to think that what's important to me doesnt really matter anymore. My goals are stretching so far that I can no longer see them. I dont know what I am supposed to do anymore. I dont really care about much anymore. And so what if I am self loathing. I think that any normal human being would be if they were running around in circles. People telling you to stop being depressed over what happened a minute ago. I have to be a mindless shell. Let bad things happen and not worry about it. And I wonder about God. What is He doing? A test? or a sign? Im not sure. But you dont want to read about this. I need to be happy. I need to be strong. I need to be me. But I just dont know. I think the "me" is being bled dry. I have no one to talk to, but this blog...which I guess would be the public. We have our own problems, why should I expect anyone to care about mine? That's just it. I am not supposed to have problems. I am supposed to forget that there is no hope anymore. The corruption of this world has soiled the minds of the innocent, and I just dont care anymore.
So go ahead and tell me that I am not supposed to feel this way. That you are SICK of me feeling sorry for myself. Well how about someone feel sorry for me for a change and want to talk to ME about it. Because I am a human being whether or not people want to believe it. And sometimes I just need to talk to someone.